Wrong Lifetime

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I once had a boyfriend who was a really voracious reader. He was also a musician and as you could imagine, he "married" (not me), but those two interests; reading almost every biography / autobiography of past and contemporary musicians / bands he could get his hands on. We both loved to read, but we rarely discussed the books we read, except there was something we believed would be of particular interest to the other.

One such book was the story of Crosby, Stills, Nash, & Young, sixties rock band. Ron shared with me how fascinated he was with something he'd read about David Crosby. At a certain point in Crosby's career, it became apparent to friends and family that their son, brother, cousin, friend, had become a very rich rock star. Whether it was voluntary or by request, Crosby shared his good fortune with those close to him. Although he knew he could easily express his generosity by writing checks (and knew that money would be more than appreciated), he also understood human nature-the money was likely to be wasted on partying and meaningless acquisitions. So instead, he gifted it by surprising one friend, for example, who'd expressed an interest in photography, with a state of the art camera and photographic equipment. He gave others similar gifts that they could use to "feed themselves for a lifetime."

Despite the fact that by his own admission, he was a hopeless addict, Crosby had the wisdom to appreciate Lao Tzu's parable of the fish: "Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. a lifetime. " Rather than give those closest to him "vulnerable" cash or useless gifts, Crosby paid close attention to what they shared with him about their dreams and aspirations, what they really wanted to do with their lives but felt they could not pursue due to limited financial resources andave them instead, the gift of a beginning. This left them with only their excuses to hold them back, which is what most people use to claim that it's not possible to follow their heart's desire: I'm too old, too fat, too tired, too lazy, have kids, have no time, no money, no motivation, am disabled, oppressed, am the wrong color, gender, the wrong faith, or my personal favorite, the wrong lifetime. For every one of those excuses, I can provide you with an example of someone who achieved their goal in spite of the obstacle.

For most of us, our excuses are as endless as our desire to chase after more acquisitions. It is unlawful that you will ever have a generous benefactor like David Crosby. So that means, you're going to have to do it yourself! -imagine that! You can initially be fired up by someone you know who "walks the talk" but extremely, it is your responsibility. Motivation must be intrinsic. It can not be bestowed upon you by another. YOU are the one that has to fire YOURSELF up. As long as ONE other person has achieved what you desire, YOU can be number two! And if no one has ever achieved what you desire, you can be number one. It's that simple. No, really, it is.

by Jini Cicero, CSCS

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